It's clear that after a decade of living here I must now face the music that although the valley is a beautiful place to live, the small mind mentality of the area will never allow me to fit in. And that's all right. I've been blessed to have kids that can have intelligent, albeit sometimes sarcastic, conversation so at least I do get some intellectual stimulation. Not a slap to my husband by not mentioning him, but I am around the kids more than I am around him. Naturally I had hoped to have friends my own age but it's just not gonna happen I'm afraid. Oh well. Time to move on.
Ok, we really can't go anywhere, not yet, not for another 4 years at least. That's when the child support ends for Frank. Then we could leave the state without having to go through the grief of having to change the order again and having to deal with more states. Just better to leave everything as it is. So, being that we have to remain here we might as well make the very best of it. I plan to help pass the time by keeping a Roanoke journal. I will be curious to see if things are as strange as I perceive them to be, odd to others as well.
Ok, focusing on the friend dilemma for now. I had a friend, who wasn't my age and although was a little wacko, was nonetheless someone I did consider a friend. Naturally she moved away to Clearwater Florida after her husband passed away last year. I have another friend who my family calls phone buddy because that's where we basically interact. The last time I saw her in person was when we went out to lunch for her birthday in October. Hmmmm, not exactly what I was hoping for in a friend.
I come from a place, Brooklyn, where I had friends or family over, or I was over their houses practically every day. Here I get someone to stop by if they're coming down 81 on their way to somewhere else. You know how far and few those visits are? We had Frank's brother Russell and his friend stop by last week on their way back from spring break in Daytona. We were so thrilled to have people our own age sitting across our dining room table, drinking wine, smoking cigars and having a good ole time. So naturally I overdid it and ending the evening paying homage to the porcelain god. Haven't done that in a while. I have not been able to look at or smell red wine for l0 days now. I wonder if I've done to wine what I did to shots of tequilla many years ago, placing it in the no smell, no lookie category. So you see it would be nice to have some sort of friends who would come over, have a drink, play a game, listen to some music, you know the things you probably always took for granted. A decade without and you will no longer.
***FLASH*** (This is what I will use when something happens when I'm writing...think of it as a crawl across the bottom of the computer screen.) Frank just came bursting through the door to make sure I'm all right. What a dope! Just because I didn't answer my phone (didn't hear it). Usually Max lets me know the phone is ringing but he's not here to alert me today. So Frank couldn't "find me" and knew Max, (Killer) wasn't here to protect me so he imagined all sorts of terrible scenarios. Huh? Couldn't he have imagined a scenario where a hot pool boy was here? Do you need to actually have a pool to have a pool boy? Actually he probably in a dark recess of his twisted mind thought he could catch me with someone. Didn't know my type would be in such demand, so I threw him out and told him to go back to work and make some money, and to stop interrupting my time.***FLASH***
Ok, back to me. I knew there was the possibility that the loneliness might happen but I had to weigh what I thought was more important for my kids and so that took a back seat. I do not regret it one moment and would actually make the same decision as I have, for I see how my children have grown up. Luckily they too do not take the area too seriously and know how to differentiate between what they are exposed to and what they should keep from it. We especially get a kick out of the history lessons down here especially as it pertains to the Civil War. Man I learned a different version up in NY. Here you think that Lee actually didn't surrender to Grant, but just asked him to "hold his sword for a spell."
There are many ridiculous things about the schools here, the reason we came here, and don't think for a minute that's not thrown up in my face everytime I relay another absurd story about something that's gone on in them. Last week was the spelling list, the "challenge" list that I forbade my daughter to take, much to the chagrine of her teacher who ambushed me in the hall. When I explained to her that I thought the list was ridiculous, how often did you use the word fleabane in a sentence in the last year?, and that I thought the words they picked were only going to screw her up, I bet she wished she just listened to my daughter when she said "my mom forbids me to take that list." I think the teacher should at least know what the freaking word means before they assign it!
Yesterday was Diversity Day, or what I like to call it, Diversion Day. They make like it's a day showcasing different countries, with projects being done by each grade level, an assembly ending the day's activities, which I went to. What a bunch of propaganda. They used the day to push their agenda to a bunch of captive elementary schoolers. "We are all M&M's. We need to be charitable adults. We are one big happy family. Blah, blah, blah" What a bunch of crap. They took a nice cultural day and had to twist it to fit their way of thinking. I resent schools pushing their morality on my kids. I'm the parent. I can do that. I need you to teach my kids scholastically. This character counts stuff is bullshit. I don't need you to tell my 7th grader that in order to be a "good" citizen they have to donate 6 hours a grading period to a worthy cause., which they will be graded on. And if they get paid for their work they have to donate it. Huh? What a bunch of shizen as my son would say.
Ok, I now have to get off this thing and go lift some weights because I am way overweight according to my waitst size and the federal guidelines.